The Porn Fix: Your Unspoken Addiction

I understand that you’re going through a difficult time with pornography addiction, and I want you to know you’re not alone in this struggle. Many people today are facing the same challenges, which isn’t surprising given the world we live in. Everywhere you look, society promotes the idea that fulfilling carnal desires is the most important aspect of life, especially when it comes to relationships and marriage. But I want you to realise that this isn’t true, particularly from the perspective of our deen.

It’s easy to lose focus in today’s world. Many young people, like yourself, are heavily influenced by a culture that glorifies sexual pleasure above all else. You’re constantly exposed to sexualised images and messages, which can make it seem as though this is normal or even expected. This can distort your perception of relationships, marriage, and your own desires. However, these influences are misleading. In Islam, marriage is far more than just satisfying physical urges—it’s about emotional and spiritual connection, mutual respect, and building a life that pleases Allah.

To give you some perspective, a recent survey carried out by Muslim Census, revealed that 83% of British Muslims have consumed pornography at some point in their lives, with the number being even higher among younger Muslims. This reflects a global trend, where younger generations are increasingly exposed to pornography due to how easily accessible it is online. For someone who values their faith, this creates a deep internal conflict. It can lead to a sort of Jekyll-and-Hyde personality—hiding a dark side driven by addiction while presenting a brighter face to family and the wider community.

Over time, pornography addiction escalates and rewires your brain. What might have started as curiosity or a small habit can turn into a deeper addiction, where you find yourself seeking out more extreme content just to get the same thrill. This slippery slope is dangerous. You may find yourself watching increasingly violent or exploitative material, and eventually, even the most disturbing content—like child pornography—may seem acceptable. This is the nature of addiction—it numbs your conscience and can lead you down paths you never thought you’d take. It not only distorts how you see others and intimacy, but also erodes your relationships, your morals, and your connection to your deen.

Consider how often we hear about celebrities being exposed for possessing indecent images of children. It’s becoming more common, with public figures being caught in this dark spiral. On social media, you’ve probably seen stories of bounty hunters catching adults who had arranged to meet children—it’s shocking. But here’s the reality: if you continue down this path, this could be you. You might tell yourself it’s “harmless” pornography, but addiction escalates into darker, more dangerous territory. Addiction knows no boundaries, and it can lead you to places you never imagined, with devastating consequences for your soul and your life—both legally and socially.

Here are a few examples of prominent figures who have faced serious charges related to indecent child images or sexual abuse:

1. Huw Edwards, a former BBC presenter, was charged in 2023 for receiving indecent images of children via WhatsApp.
2. R. Kelly was sentenced in 2023 for additional child abuse charges.
3. Danny Masterson was convicted of multiple rape charges in 2023.
4. Josh Duggar was convicted for possession of child pornography.
5. Gary Glitter was convicted for sexual abuse and possession of child pornography.

So, who benefits from your addiction? It’s certainly not you. While you’re left feeling empty, worthless, and disconnected, those behind the porn industry are profiting from your misery. The pornography industry is one of the most lucrative industries in the world, thriving on people’s struggles and brokenness. They profit from your destruction, using addiction to fuel their business. This vicious cycle traps you in deeper feelings of isolation and guilt, which can lead to even darker places—like alcohol, substance abuse, or, tragically, even thoughts of suicide.

What about marriage? Will it solve this?
You may be considering marriage or are already married, but the person who loves you deeply is being unfairly compared to your addiction. Pornography distorts your view of relationships and intimacy, making you compare your spouse or future spouse to unrealistic, degrading images. Instead of building a marriage on love, mercy, and respect—the values our deen holds sacred—you risk seeing marriage as unnecessary because your desires are being met elsewhere. This mindset slowly erodes the very foundation of what marriage is meant to be, leading to the breakdown of not only your relationship but also the strength of families, communities, and society as a whole.

When relationships become transactional, society suffers. Genuine connections are replaced by self-interest, trust erodes, and individuals become lonelier and more disconnected. Communities fragment, prioritising personal gain over collective well-being. This breakdown of meaningful relationships weakens social cohesion, reducing empathy and compassion, and exacerbating social issues like alienation and mental health struggles.

Marriage won’t cure your addiction; the core issue is that your top priority should not be carnal desires. To truly overcome this habit and find peace, you need to shift your mindset. By changing how you view intimacy and relationships, you can begin to cultivate deeper, more meaningful connections. Remember, relationships are not transactional; they are meant to be sources of love and support. Other people were put on this earth to bring you solace, not solitude and emptiness. This transformation will lead to a more fulfilling life, where relationships are built on genuine connection and mutual respect, rather than fleeting physical satisfaction. Focus on what truly matters, and you will find the strength to break free from your addiction.

Have you ever considered why the death toll of children is so high in Gaza? Despite immense trials and hardships, the people of Palestine find peace in their relationships. They understand that the true purpose of relationships lies in family and procreation, not merely in satisfying carnal desires. Isn’t it ironic that those with seemingly nothing to live for find peace in their relationships, while those in the West, with everything to gain, continue to search for tranquillity within themselves? This highlights a profound disconnect in our understanding of what truly matters in life and love.

Note from the Editor

This is the hardest piece I have ever written, not because I don’t understand the challenge, but because when I was growing up, pornography was abhorred by Muslims and non-Muslims alike. To see it evolve into a widespread addiction is truly heart breaking. While I know this shift is due to a materialistic and transactional society on steroids, I feel deep empathy for anyone grappling with this addiction. It is an issue that often gets swept under the carpet, but sadly, it affects Muslims not just as individuals but the entire community. This addiction has taken mankind from the best of creation to beings who live solely for their desires. I hope that by addressing these issues, we can begin to find a path back to a more fulfilling and meaningful existence.